5 Keys To Approaching Women – The Right Way

Let me ask you this:  How many times have you seen a woman and been attracted to her, and wanted to meet her SO badly, but …  you just couldn’t bring yourself to approach her and start a conversation?

You just WISH you knew the RIGHT things to do and the RIGHT things to say.  But you didn’t, and you just sat there and let ANOTHER opportunity to meet a beautiful woman slip right through your fingers!

I know for myself, I’d been in that very situation COUNTLESS times throughout my teen and adult life.  Before I learned what I know now, EVERY time I saw a woman I liked the look of, I would suffer that torment that so many ordinary guys go through, with all the usual accompanying thoughts and feelings.

You know the ones – those feelings of fear, anxiety, apprehension, the lack of self confidence, and the loss for words and the RIGHT things to say to get her to like you.  You sit there asking yourself questions like – “how do I start talking to her?”, “what will I say?”, “what if I make a dick of myself?”, “why would she even wanna talk to someone like me!”.

Well, I want to assure you that there are things you can do and say.  There are many men – men who have their “game” together – all over the world who approach women and start conversations with them every single day.  And, they get their phone numbers or email addresses and organize a time to do something – together.

Why should it be any different for you, and why shouldn’t YOU get some of those millions of women out there, for yourself?

If you learn some simple approach and conversation methods, AS WELL AS learning and APPLYING the CORRECT attitudes, characteristics and behavior traits that women are instinctively programmed to respond to, then you CAN have your fair share of women too.  BEAUTIFUL WOMEN!

Never again will you have to suffer that torment of feeling like a gutless wimp, because you are NOT able to approach a woman, start a conversation and get her number so you can take things further.

So, here are 5 VITALLY important attitudes, characteristics and behavior traits that you NEED to display when approaching a woman.

  • Relax! This is SO important.  If you are uptight, nervous and self conscious, then your attitude and behavior will not be attractive at all.  Women can smell fear and lack of confidence better than dogs can smell shit.  If you want to stand any sort of chance with ANY woman – regardless of what she looks like – then you absolutely MUST remain easygoing and relaxed.
  • Be Happy! How many times have you thought about approaching a gorgeous girl?  Countless times right?  And, how many times did you picture yourself HAPPY about having to approach her?  I’m guessing if you are anything like I was, NOT many, am I right again?  In fact, do you even think about being happy when you are faced with that situation?  I know for me, I would fantasize about being cool, and suave, but deep down, I was ALWAYS far too concerned about my fear and nervousness to even think about being happy – let alone displaying myself as a cool, suave man.  But, it’s such an important factor in any approach, and without it, you’re doomed.  Women are attracted to happy guys, so it’s VITALLY important that you get yourself into the right frame of mind BEFORE you even think about approaching.  Your attitude and demeanor will directly affect the outcome of your encounter.  So for a positive outcome, you MUST have a positive attitude, be easygoing, relaxed and HAPPY.
  • Be CONFIDENT. We talk so much about confidence, and sometimes it must sound like a broken record.  But honestly, it really is one of the fundamental keys to success with women.  You can know all the best pick up lines and routines on earth, but without confidence, NOTHING you do will ever amount to any sort of success with women.  Women are NOT attracted to men who lack confidence!
  • Be Prepared. Just like the boy scouts always say, you should ALWAYS be prepared.  This is a vital key in successful approaches.  Why?  Because by being prepared, you can eliminate (or at least minimize) any fears, nervousness or anxiety that can be caused by you having to step out of “the” comfort zone.  You know the zone – the one where it would be “nice” to be able to approach any woman you like, but you know you’re NOT really going to.  So to succeed in getting out of that comfort zone, it’s important to be prepared with something to say to initiate contact and spark interest, and then, continue a conversation so you can start to build a level of comfort and rapport.
  • Focus on HER! This point could be first as well, but I put it last because I want you to understand the importance of YOUR mindset, attitudes and behavior first.  Those are the vital ingredients for your success with women.  Now, we are talking about focusing on her BEFORE you initiate contact.  Firstly, focusing on her helps you to gain information about her e.g. is she alone, what type of mood does she appear to be in, does she seem to be enjoying herself etc.  The more information you have, the more prepared you can tailor your approach to suit the situation, and increase the chance of success.  Secondly (and more importantly) it helps you to shift the focus away from your own negative thoughts, fears, anxieties and doubts.  This is a crucial part of preparing to approach because it helps you to get in the right frame of mind, and gives you the best chance of a successful encounter.  You MUST eliminate any self doubt, fear and anxiety or it will show through in your demeanor and behavior, and destroy your ability to appear cool and suave.

These attitudes, characteristics and behavior traits are essential keys to being successful when approaching women.  If you can learn, apply and make these things an integral part of your personality, then meeting and attracting women anywhere, anytime will become a breeze, and a natural part of who you are.

In the next article I will be giving you a couple simple approach routines and conversation starters, with specific things you can say and do that will greatly increase your chances of successful approaching and pick-ups.

Stay tuned and keep going with the study and practice guys.  Till  next time,



How To Get A Womans Number, AND Make Sure That It’s REAL

How many times have you asked for a woman’s phone number, only to have her flat out refuse and say NO?  Or, has she given you A number, but when you call, you find out that it isn’t real?

If you answered YES, then I completely understand what you have been through.

You see, before I learned the secrets of meeting and attracting women, I would quite often find myself in this situation.  There were a few times where I asked, and I got a number.  It was a real buzz and felt GREAT at the time, but then I’d call later, only to find out that it was false.  There were other times though, where I’d ask a woman for her number, only to be REJECTED right there and then.  And sometimes, the women were devastatingly MEAN!

What a confidence KILLER man!  I’m sure you’ll agree with me, that it’s a real CRUSH to the ego, not to mention the humiliation and embarrassment you suffer.  Sometimes, that can completely destroy a man’s confidence and desire to try again.

I want to assure you though, that it doesn’t have to be this way.  If you follow a couple simple rules, and stick to the system of generating and triggering attraction in women first, then you can most definitely get ANY woman’s number, and NEVER have to suffer like that again.

I’m going to show you a couple of simple things you can do, to ensure that you ALWAYS get a number, and also, make sure that number is ALWAYS REAL.

Firstly though, it’s important for you to realize, that ASKING for a number is NOT the way to get numbers.  Asking a woman for her number is like asking her if she thinks you are attractive enough, and valuable enough, for her to consider if you are worthy of a CHANCE to be a part of her life.  Women DO NOT respond well to men who behave this way.  It is weak, insecure and unattractive behavior.

Remember that women respond favorably to confident, relaxed, powerful, dominant Alpha Males.  Alpha Males don’t ASK for numbers.  Alpha Males GET numbers.  We get numbers by being confident, relaxed and easygoing, yet direct and forthright.

Saying “Could I please have your number?” is nowhere near as effective as “Hey, it’s been cool meeting you.  We should get together some time and go do something fun.  What’s your number?”

Can you see the difference?

The first is a request, and implies that you need to ask because you feel you NEED her permission to hang out again.  This gives the woman the impression that you value yourself LOWER than her.  Remember, women don’t like to date men who have a perceived LOWER value than themselves.  Women only want to date men who have an equal or greater value.  Requests leave room for rejection.  Don’t open yourself up for rejection.

The other, is a statement, and implies that you are a man who values YOURSELF highly and want to SHARE yourself and your time with her.  It shows that you are interested in getting to know her better, that it could be fun to do that, and you are confident and direct enough to go after what you want – but on YOUR terms, not hers.  This sub-consciously says to her that you are a confident, take charge, high status, high value man, and giving you her number could be the START of something GREAT.  Besides all that, statements are also harder to reject.

So the first rule to follow when getting a number is:  Don’t Ask.  Make a statement that is hard to refuse.

Here are a couple examples you can try out:

  • “Its been great talking to you, I’ve really enjoyed our conversation.  We should carry on over a coffee some other time, give me your number and I’ll call you.”
  • “So we’ll have to see how good you really are at (whatever she says she’s good at), I’ll grab your number and we’ll go do it sometime.”
  • It’s been cool meeting you.  You seem like a really fun person.  Give me your number and we”ll go do something fun sometime.”

The second rule to follow when getting a number is:  ALWAYS check that the number is real or false BEFORE you part.

There is a really simple test I use to make sure the number I have been given is real or not.  All I do is repeat the number back to her straight after she gives it to me.  But instead of saying the last number, I’ll give her back a different last number.  E.g. she says 0271234567, and I’ll say 0271234562.

If she has given you her real number, she will correct you straight away.  If she doesn’t correct you, then you know she has given you a bogus number.  Don’t be angry or upset at her.  Just call her out on it right there and then, playfully hit her, give her a wink and a smile, tell her you understand and say “you can never be too safe”, and move on.  Go meet someone new or hang out with women you already know.

It’s pointless trying to convince her to give you her number.  If you have a high enough social value she’ll be wanting to give you her real number soon enough anyway.

If you really want to become GREAT with women, and learn some powerful methods and techniques for approaching them and getting their numbers, I highly recommend that you check out my friend Joe Matthews system The Art of Approaching.  He will take you step by step through the process of approaching, meeting and attracting women in a fun, easy to understand and apply system.   Begin by trying out his Free Course On How To Find, Meet, And Attract Any Woman!
Click Here

Have fun trying these tips out.

All the best


Do You Suffer From “Nice Guy” Syndrome?

By: Thundercat ArtOfApproaching.com

I have a question for you…

Have you ever heard that old addage “Nice Guys Finish Last?”

Well, I’m here to tell you that saying is 100% true! But not for
the reasons you may think.

Being a “Nice Guy” with women doesn’t work, not because you get too
caught up in what a girl wants and get stuck as a friend, but
because Nice Guys are typically very, very…


That’s right. When you’re a “Nice Guy,” you’re not really being
nice, you’re being EMOTIONALLY GREEDY.

Let me explain…

One of the biggest problems guys who are struggling with women face
is something I like to call “the Nice Guy factor.”

So many guys have such a weak identity and so little self-esteem,
that they base their own self-worth on what other people THINK OF

These guys are at the mercy of everyone else in their lives, so
they try their best to please the people around them, hoping
they’ll continue to think highly of them, so they can feel good
about themselves. That’s not so bad, right? It feels good when
others approve of you, doesn’t it?

Most people look at this behavior and would instantly categorize
these poor men in the “Nice Guys” column. After all, they’re the
ones who don’t like conflict. They’re the ones who don’t want to
make waves. They’re the ones who want everyone to be happy.

They are also some of the most selfish people on the planet.

Seriously. I know this because I used to be one of these people,
and I know all their dirty little secrets! And the point of this
newsletter is to make everyone who thinks of themselves as “nice”
or as a “victim” really, really pissed off!!!

All of you “Nice Guys” out there reading this are nothing more than
“people pleasers.” Somewhere in your life, you found out that
pleasing people is a way to get other people to like you and admire
you so you can feel good about yourself. Whether it was the
acclaim of your parents, or the acceptance of your friends,
somewhere in your time on this planet YOU LEARNED to feel good
based on what other people think of you.

But I’m here to tell you that using other people’s feelings and
goodwill like that is not only harmful, but dishonest!

Anyone who says “I can’t stand conflict!” or “If you can’t say
anything nice, don’t say anything at all!” should do us all a favor
and move to the planet “Ideal” where life is wonderful, we all have
transparent heads, and there is no war. Only on this planet will
you be able to find that everyone is willing to give you the moral
support you need.

But that’s the crux of the issue right there. All you “Nice Guys”
have a losing mentality about your need for support. Your
methodology is: “I am so loving and giving and nice, I expect you
to treat me the exact same way as I treat you!”

Here is the typical thought process of Nice Guys:

–“Don’t disagree with me! It’s not fair because I do so much for

–“Please be sympathetic and comfort me when I’m upset! I’m needy
and can’t comfort myself.”

–“Always be in a good mood. I am always trying to make you happy
and if I can’t, I feel ashamed and mad at you!”

–“Pay attention to me when I need it! I’ve earned it after all
I’ve done for you!!!!”

–“Take care of me by doing what I’m afraid to do! I take care of
you, so you need to return the favor!!!!”

Look at those thoughts above, and ask yourself “If someone was
saying that to me, how would I react?” Now you know where women
are coming from when they don’t want to have relationships with
“Nice Guys.”

Once that happens and the needy demands of “Nice Guys” go unmet,
they fall into the deep pits of self-pity and depression. They
also feel a lot of shame and anger at their failure to please the
women they want, and though these “Nice Guys” can keep their
pleasant demeanor up for a long time, their resentment of the women
they want to please will grow and grow until it explodes in anger
and rage, either directed at others, themselves, or both.

This kind of mentality can extremely damage your self respect and
cause others to not want to be around you.

So what’s a “Nice Guy” to do?

If you want to have success with women, you need to stop being
agreeable and instead be straightforward and honest, especially
when you have to go against the wishes of others and disappoint
them. You can do this with kindness and sensitivity, but you MUST
do this nonetheless.

Only by being honest, with yourself and with others, will you be
able to overcome the selfish “nice guy” habits you have adopted in
your life. And when you do this, you will stop caring about what
other people think of you because the source of your validation
comes from the fact that you’re being true to yourself and
straightforward with others, and you will cease to harbor
resentment and anger, and have more self respect and less depression.

That is the only way I have found to truly stop being a “Nice Guy”
and become the type of man other people can respect. It can be
hard being honest with others (especially yourself), but in the end
it is far more rewarding than any other behavior you can adopt.

Your first step on the road to being that type of guy should be to
read my book The Art of Approaching. In it, you will learn how to
create the opportunities with women you’ll need to practice being
straightforward and honest with them. If you can be reading my
book in literally minutes by clicking below:

Click Here To Download Now!

Once you adopt this new way of thinking, you will see your success
with women dramatically improve, so don’t wait! Get The Art of
Approaching right now.

Wishing you success,